Gen X Translation: Grandma Edition

When we say “Grandma was getting ready to go somewhere,” we mean:

* Pink foam rollers set tight like armor, scarf tied down just in case

* A coin purse tucked in her bosom like a personal bank vault (exact change, every time)

* A cheek full of snuff, working overtime like it had a job to do

She didn’t need a handbag.

Everything important was already on her.

And somehow… she still ran the whole house without missing a beat.